Imagine that you are at a Christmas Eve party and someone states loudly and emphatically that they are either very happy or very unhappy with Trump’s picks for executive positions. Can you feel the shift in the energy of the room as every thinks, “OMG, here we go!”? How do you react? What do you do? Leave the room? Jump into the conversation ready to fight for what you believe in?
Energy work, a.k.a. energy healing, intuitive healing or spiritual healing, involves direct transformation of the field of energy and intelligence that underlies the physical universe. It enables us to get at the very root of a situation so we can change what happens on the surface, on the expressed level of existence. Based on my training and experience, I divide energy work into two broad categories. I started first with techniques that used energy to transform energy. These techniques were effective, but I used either my own energy or energy I gathered from the field. I learned that this could either drain my energy or that I could take on someone else’s energy. Neither of these sounded appealing to me. Consequently, I switched to using energy as information and let the intelligence of the field itself produce whatever transformation it deemed appropriate. This proved to be very much more efficient and saved me from undesirable consequences from doing this work.
After trying several approaches to energy field work, I studied Matrix Energetics® with Richard Bartlett and Mellissa Joy Jonsson. I acquired both understanding of how energy work works and innumerable tools for doing it. I’m about to share a couple basic tools you can use to manage social stress during the holidays, and beyond.
The first skill to acquire is to become “centered” or “grounded.” I was taught to “drop down into the heart,” which means shifting one’s awareness from one’s head to one’s heart. Most of us locate our awareness in our head because we see with our eyes and think with our brains. The trick is to shift your awareness to your heart and to feel a situation rather than see it. Try it now. Inhale and exhale once, deeply, and then put your attention on the center of your chest — inside, the actual center of your chest where your heart is located — and simply notice what’s there. It may help to put a hand on the center of your chest.
The second skill to acquire is the ability to observe the energy of a situation The trick to doing this is to be very innocent about what shows up. Typically, one’s intellect will jump in and discredit anything unfamiliar or unacceptable. You have to consciously allow your mind to notice whatever pops up. Don’t expect the information the field provides you to be rational. It may feel like you are dreaming. You don’t need to understand what you perceive. Just notice and accept whatever comes to mind. Trust that anything and everything that shows up contains relevant information. Just go with it, as you do with a daydream while you are “in” it.
The third skill is, well, it isn’t a skill at all. You just observe what shows up innocently, without expectation or even desire. Don’t try to will something to change. Just by putting your attention on a situation, it will change in whatever way it needs to. Any situation will transform spontaneously, just by your putting your attention on it.
Okay, it’s Christmas Eve and the family and some friends are gathered. Your cousin John starts in on Trump’s appointments. It doesn’t matter whether he likes them or hates them; the point is that tensions rise as soon as he opens his mouth.
The first thing you do is notice that you are reacting to the situation. What your reaction is doesn’t matter. The point is to become aware that you are reacting.
The second thing you do is to step out of the story of conflict and ground yourself. Get into the field of the heart where you are separate from your reaction and from the tension around you. Find your place of peace within.
The third thing you do is notice what’s there, what you are thinking and feeling. Look at your thoughts and feelings without judgment, accepting what’s there with innocent curiosity. You don’t have to analyze the situation and you don’t have to try to change anything. You look at your own feelings — reactions to the situation.
The act of your attending to what’s there without judgment begins the process of transforming your reaction. If your attention seems to be directed at two (or more) thoughts or feelings, just link those two things together and settle into your center. These acts of attention unify differences and balance your awareness so that you can rejoin the conversation from a place of peace and harmony.
You can use energy field work for any conflict or stress. Indeed, you can use it for any situation that presents itself. There are many techniques you can learn if you care to take up the study of energy field work. I use dozens of techniques that I either learned or cognized. I find the study of Matrix Energetics greatly rewarding for the variety of techniques it offers, the fun of working with information as it shows up without trying to analyze cause and effect, and also for the freedom to incorporate other techniques.
During consultations, I often teach my clients two or three of the tools for dealing with conflict (list below). One of my clients asked recently how to know which tool to use. I told him to “use whatever comes into your awareness when you become aware that you are experiencing stress.” I often use Ho’oponopono and Focusing while doing energy field work. I try to use Nonviolent Communication all the time, when doing energy field work silently and when speaking aloud. My life and the effectiveness of my practice have grown beautifully since I learned all these tools.
Here is the list of topics (posts) on the theme of Living with the Other Half of America — the half that doesn’t agree with you. They provide powerful tools for quickly transforming conflict that you can use in this holiday season and beyond.
#0: Transcendence — the Transcendental Meditation™ program
#1: Empathy — Nonviolent Communication
#2: Clearing Conflict — Ho’oponopono
#3: Choices — The Option Method
#4: Nurturing Parts Within — Focusing
#5: Changing the Energy of Conflict — Energy Field Work
This post is the fifth and last in the series. I cover related topics in my monthly webinars. Please join us in person, by phone or by Internet videoconferencing.