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Transforming Trauma

Ornamental Pear Trees

The words I heard were all too familiar: “I experienced trauma as a child and have been working on it all my life, but it’s still in my body and I cannot have a satisfying, intimate relationship.” Though we were speaking by phone, I was able to check into her field. I saw an energy tangle that lay outside her body, waiting to be acknowledged, accepted and consoled. We agreed to meet for a series of three sessions.

In most people’s minds, three sessions would scarcely be enough to even start to tell the story of their trauma and all the work that has been done to relieve the stress from that trauma. However, the approach I use allows me to “see” the situation instantly, so I’m ready to start transforming the trauma the moment a client arrives. I need only offer some explanation of how I work and instruct my client to sit comfortably while I “do my thing” silently. (I don’t like to call it “work” because I don’t expend any energy!) Speaking is needed only when I need to clarify something or offer a suggestion for reframing a client’s interpretation of experience.

My “thing,” by which I mean my approach to trauma, is energy healing combined with other approaches. In dealing with trauma, what I see appears as an energy tangle — a jumble of energy that often is located outside a person’s physical body. Energy tangles are parts within that are suffering and find themselves cut off from one’s true soul (‘Self’ written with a capital ‘S’).

I clear energy tangles by combining techniques from Matrix Energetics® with approaches from Inner Relationship Focusing, the Option Method, FasterEFT and Ho’oponopono. Both Matrix Energetics and Ho’oponopono can be done silently, without speaking with clients. In my approach, I communicate mentally with the energy tangles rather than by speaking out loud. By working silently with these inner parts (energy tangles), my clients are spared having to relive their traumas, analyze what happened and try to make some peace with that. The situation of the client I described above provides a beautiful illustration of both how I work and the result of that work being done silently, on the subtle level.

In our first session, after instructing my client to sit comfortably and to close the eyes as long as that felt safe, I got in touch once again with the energy tangle I had felt when we first spoke by phone. I sensed this part felt hurt, violated, ashamed and guilty. This involved using the subtle senses of clairvoyance (subtle sight) and clairaudience (subtle hearing), along with the empathic sense, that is, feeling directly what someone else is feeling and thinking. All the subtle senses may be used. I used the process of Inner Relationship Focusing to create a safe space for the tangle to open and allow itself to be known. Interestingly, though the part believed that it should stay hidden, its desire for connection forced it to tell its story. Telling its story allowed it to relax and untangle spontaneously. As the tangle opened, my client took several deep breaths and made some gentle bodily movements. These were physical responses to energy shifting.

During this process, a second part showed up, also outside my client’s physical body. This part held the physical effects of the trauma, which related to the 2nd chakra. It was angry at the first part, accusing it of holding her back out to fear of getting hurt again. I worked with this part separately for some time, then, I mediated between the two parts to achieve a degree of reconciliation. In the remainder of the session, I cleared the heart chakra and made an energetic connection between her heart and the “heart” of the hurt, sad part. This allowed the hurt part to move closer to her physical body.

We’re not done, but that’s a lot of progress for just one session!

When I finished my silent interaction with her inner parts, my client laughed heartily and smiled broadly, lighting up the room. She may not have realized it, but she looked very much happier than when she entered my office. She expressed her surprise at how comfortable the experience had been and at how much more at ease she felt immediately after completing just the first session.

While my client gained a large measure of freedom from her trauma, I gained a special insight about the difference between my approach and the traditional approach of clinical psychology. From what these inner parts revealed, I concluded that they felt positive about their role in protecting her from further trauma and pain. I shared this with my client, emphasizing that her defensive reactions (primarily isolation, rationalization and projection, born of anger and fear) were not failures on her part, but rather, they served an important function — protection. I’ve not seen this point in the professional literature on trauma. Psychological defenses seem to be regarded by mental health professionals as part of a person’s problem rather than as something to applaud and appreciate. Reframing a client’s and a clinician’s view of psychological defenses relieves a client of their sense of failure and inadequacy. Seeing defense strategies as effective coping mechanisms empowers a person so they can see themselves as strong and capable. This accelerates the transformation of trauma so it can be completed in just a few sessions.

It will take two more sessions to completely transform her trauma. As the energy of her stress gets relieved, her defenses will no longer be necessary. She will also become less critical of her limitations. She’ll find herself able to open up to intimacy. I told her that we might have to reprogram the way she responds to overtures for connection and that this probably would require two or three sessions after we finish clearing away the stress.

You can see from this account how this amazingly gentle and rapid process for transformation of trauma can free a person of the pain, fear, self-reproach and self-doubt that trauma brings. If you know anyone who suffers from trauma, please suggest that they read this blog post and my eBook, which is available for download through this website. I’m here to help. Prospective clients can schedule a free 15-minute get acquainted session by clicking on the Bookings tab on my website. Three-session programs can be booked and paid for too. Start by clicking the Bookings tab.

For your WellBEING,


David Sands

Partnership for WellBEING

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